The New Normal.
SO it's been a minute since my last blog post, and while a lot has changed, it certainly hasn't gone fully undocumented (if you follow me on Social Media, anyways). It may have taken me damn near 9 months to activate, but things are settling into a new normal per say, and I have to say that I'm quite enjoying it.
Probably the biggest change and switch centers around my transfer. In the beginning of August, I formally put in a request to transfer to a different location, after thinking about it and plotting it out for damn near a year. My nervousness for change and unexpected territory kept me from formally making a change for a long time, but I knew if I didn't at least try it, I never would. The best part is that it worked out for the best, and at the beginning of September, I made the change to the CarMax location in Pleasanton, roughly 40 minutes from home. It's a bit closer than the hour commute I made previously, but commute not withstanding, it's been a nice relief for me in a new environment with a new team. I've learned a great deal and have managed to feel quite at home rather quickly, which makes me feel as though I'm doing something right. I've been able to re-affirm the decisions I've made to myself, in that I'm figuring out this career thing and making the appropriate moves to put myself in the appropriate places. It does help to have a pretty kick-ass team, if I can say so myself.
I took a visit today to the CarMax I started at, in Sacramento, to visit people and check-in, if you will. For the first time, I truly felt more like a visitor, which honestly isn't a bad thing at all. For so long I felt a sense of comfort and complacency, which I felt started to stifle my growth a great deal. The challenges were long gone and it was easy to skate by, even with throwing in wrenches and road blocks. Walking around and talking to people today, it felt nice to catch up and share the journey I've embarked on, and to receive tons of support from my peers felt really nice.
Probably the biggest -- and best -- part of this new normal is my overall mental health. For so long I struggled with anxiety in all varieties and varying stages of depression, most of which I've handled to the best of my ability. A simple change in environment and change of pace has done more wonders than I can even explain in words. Gone are the constant feelings of heaviness and lost, replaced with feelings of accomplishment and growing self-worth. I look forward to working with my peers and working towards the next goal together. I like the interactions with people again. When I hear "I appreciate you" now, it isn't mentally met with "You're just saying that for [insert reason here]" anymore. Now, it comes with "Thanks for that, I appreciate you as well." The weight that walked on my shoulders day in and day out is pretty amazing.
A good chunk of that mental health is being able to leave work AT WORK when I clock out for the day. I started to feel like I was always at work whenever I would leave, to the point where the work/life balance line was severely blurred at times. That isn't meant to be a bad thing, as I've always made myself available whenever needed, but there were times where I felt like I could never turn the work side of me OFF when I would leave work for the day/evening. There was no sense of detachment, no sense of disconnect. Now, when I leave work, I'm thinking about what I'm gonna do when I get home, or mapping out my next day off and what that will entail. I can think about my friends again and communicating with them -- something I'm STILL working on, don't you worry -- or I can plan out trips and life events again. I can actually think about dating again, or think about my next local adventure. My mind is actually clear for a change, and I'm not just saying it to make myself believe it. Quite honestly, that's the one thing that I've had to learn to adjust to.
I looked back on a post I made here at the start of 2018, where I outlined a few ideals for myself. It feels great to have checked off a couple on that list. Moving forward into this new normal has been a great reminder to myself that I need to continue to do the things important to me, and make the changes that are necessary and important. It's been nice to be able to just be myself, and re-figure that out again. Whatever that entails, I'm excited to see it again.
Until next time.
Probably the biggest change and switch centers around my transfer. In the beginning of August, I formally put in a request to transfer to a different location, after thinking about it and plotting it out for damn near a year. My nervousness for change and unexpected territory kept me from formally making a change for a long time, but I knew if I didn't at least try it, I never would. The best part is that it worked out for the best, and at the beginning of September, I made the change to the CarMax location in Pleasanton, roughly 40 minutes from home. It's a bit closer than the hour commute I made previously, but commute not withstanding, it's been a nice relief for me in a new environment with a new team. I've learned a great deal and have managed to feel quite at home rather quickly, which makes me feel as though I'm doing something right. I've been able to re-affirm the decisions I've made to myself, in that I'm figuring out this career thing and making the appropriate moves to put myself in the appropriate places. It does help to have a pretty kick-ass team, if I can say so myself.
I took a visit today to the CarMax I started at, in Sacramento, to visit people and check-in, if you will. For the first time, I truly felt more like a visitor, which honestly isn't a bad thing at all. For so long I felt a sense of comfort and complacency, which I felt started to stifle my growth a great deal. The challenges were long gone and it was easy to skate by, even with throwing in wrenches and road blocks. Walking around and talking to people today, it felt nice to catch up and share the journey I've embarked on, and to receive tons of support from my peers felt really nice.
Probably the biggest -- and best -- part of this new normal is my overall mental health. For so long I struggled with anxiety in all varieties and varying stages of depression, most of which I've handled to the best of my ability. A simple change in environment and change of pace has done more wonders than I can even explain in words. Gone are the constant feelings of heaviness and lost, replaced with feelings of accomplishment and growing self-worth. I look forward to working with my peers and working towards the next goal together. I like the interactions with people again. When I hear "I appreciate you" now, it isn't mentally met with "You're just saying that for [insert reason here]" anymore. Now, it comes with "Thanks for that, I appreciate you as well." The weight that walked on my shoulders day in and day out is pretty amazing.
A good chunk of that mental health is being able to leave work AT WORK when I clock out for the day. I started to feel like I was always at work whenever I would leave, to the point where the work/life balance line was severely blurred at times. That isn't meant to be a bad thing, as I've always made myself available whenever needed, but there were times where I felt like I could never turn the work side of me OFF when I would leave work for the day/evening. There was no sense of detachment, no sense of disconnect. Now, when I leave work, I'm thinking about what I'm gonna do when I get home, or mapping out my next day off and what that will entail. I can think about my friends again and communicating with them -- something I'm STILL working on, don't you worry -- or I can plan out trips and life events again. I can actually think about dating again, or think about my next local adventure. My mind is actually clear for a change, and I'm not just saying it to make myself believe it. Quite honestly, that's the one thing that I've had to learn to adjust to.
I looked back on a post I made here at the start of 2018, where I outlined a few ideals for myself. It feels great to have checked off a couple on that list. Moving forward into this new normal has been a great reminder to myself that I need to continue to do the things important to me, and make the changes that are necessary and important. It's been nice to be able to just be myself, and re-figure that out again. Whatever that entails, I'm excited to see it again.
Until next time.
Comments
Post a Comment