The Past is... The Past.
Tonight I was hovering around Facebook like I've been doing on this break, catching all the status updates that would pop up. And it was very interesting to watch them all, as the majority of them made me think about the past, what was in my past, and what isn't in my future.
So I opened Blogger and here we are.
In my life I've always been the brunt of someone trying to one-up me, to show me that their life is better than mine. And any sign of annoyance from my portion is immediately perceived to be jealousy of their life and wanting to be in their shoes. I hate to break it to you, but it's not jealously at all. I'm annoyed. Hence the annoyance, my friend.
Why am I annoyed though? Mostly it's because you feel the need to shove your life into my face, while I'm perfectly content with my life and how I chose to live it. It amazes me when people are out there to seek the attention from others, and yet they look at you and say you're just looking for attention. I've known people in my past to sit there and flaunt their luxurious lifestyle into my face and tell me that they know that secretly I aspire to be just like them. Again, I hate to break it to you, but I've got the life that I want, sitting right in front of me.
5 years ago when my mom died I never thought I'd be able to recover from it. I thought for the rest of my life I'd have to deal with heartache and suffering, but not only did I power through that, but I also powered through some other things in my life that were unexpected, like being blamed for friends' problems I was never aware of, being told to keep a relationship secret, and most of all, ridiculed for being myself. Of course, we're talking about the past here.
In my mindset of today I do my best to not carry a single regret. We make mistakes in life, as we should. But lessons in life wouldn't occur without these said mistakes. I feel that we grow with the lessons we learn from the mistakes we make. It's the ultimate goal, as such, considering that without these lessons, we carry mindsets from when we were younger. You gain knowledge as you grow, knowledge that should carry over to help you become the person that you aspire to be.
In most cases though, people harbor the past. They don't let it go. One thing I've learned is that it's definitely alright to just let go of the past and move on, especially if holding on to that past is doing nothing but holding you back from pressing forward in your life.
I personally think of an instance where a "best friend" of mine blamed me for all his life problems, said I took advantage of our friendship, did nothing for our friendship, and even for kicks threw in situations that amounted to nothing, to stomp all over me, show me he was better than me and didn't need me, that I needed him, and that I was nothing without him. And do you know what happened?
I moved on. Without him. VERY quickly.
My sadness towards him turned quickly to anger at myself for letting myself get to that point where something like this could hurt me. And once that anger passed I picked up my backpack and walked further and further away until he became nothing but a mental image..... a reminder of the mistake to never make again.
A month after that incident he e-mailed me asking if we could talk. He was "deeply remorseful" for the words and actions he had done in the month prior. He wanted another chance to show me that we were "best buds" and that "nothing could stand in the way of that." It was at that point I told him that as far as I was concerned he was nothing but an acquaintance to me. Sure we talked and laughed after that, but there was no friendship in my eyes. And there never was, and never would be again. Because it was then that I realized that the people I called friends would be my friends through it all. They wouldn't blame me for their life issues, but instead would seek support and help to get through it. As friends, we're like family.
I made it without that person. And I still do. The thoughts of it linger in my mind only to set as a reminder to myself that no matter what your true friends will always shine through the life and rough times.
The people who live in the past to prevent themselves from engaging in the life in front of them are the people, in my mind, who are holding on to something that will never exist again. When it goes, it truly is gone. A blatant refusal to enact yourself in the present can make you miss out on what's in front of you. This isn't about those who have memories, I mean people who don't engage in the present.
The past is the past. Let the vice-grip go and pick up to the present. Focus on the things you have now, the positives in front of you. Because even though it may be there right now, there is the chance that it could all be taken away from you in an instant, and it too will become another memory of the future you could have.
The past is just that, the past. Let it go. And let it be.
Live your life for the moments you have in it.
Because it could all be gone in an instant and you'll have nothing to live for.
I decided to change the look of my blog. Felt an update was in order.
Also, I hope to get onto a more consistent post schedule.
Sorry I took almost 10 days off. Just needed some time to focus on some things.
I do have one more blog in mind that I want to rattle off as well.
On to a personal note.....
I may be back later on. I would say tomorrow, but it's already Monday on the East Coast.
I'm getting glasses tomorrow as well. I'm rather excited. The Countdown will be at 8 days even as of 6am Pacific Standard Time on Monday / Today. I'm greatly looking forward to being back on the East Coast with all my friends in the few days that I'll have before Band Camp starts August 6th.
I'm excited to get back for other reasons as well, but we'll let those remain secretive for now. [smile]
Until Next Time.....
[Lanier3000]
So I opened Blogger and here we are.
In my life I've always been the brunt of someone trying to one-up me, to show me that their life is better than mine. And any sign of annoyance from my portion is immediately perceived to be jealousy of their life and wanting to be in their shoes. I hate to break it to you, but it's not jealously at all. I'm annoyed. Hence the annoyance, my friend.
Why am I annoyed though? Mostly it's because you feel the need to shove your life into my face, while I'm perfectly content with my life and how I chose to live it. It amazes me when people are out there to seek the attention from others, and yet they look at you and say you're just looking for attention. I've known people in my past to sit there and flaunt their luxurious lifestyle into my face and tell me that they know that secretly I aspire to be just like them. Again, I hate to break it to you, but I've got the life that I want, sitting right in front of me.
5 years ago when my mom died I never thought I'd be able to recover from it. I thought for the rest of my life I'd have to deal with heartache and suffering, but not only did I power through that, but I also powered through some other things in my life that were unexpected, like being blamed for friends' problems I was never aware of, being told to keep a relationship secret, and most of all, ridiculed for being myself. Of course, we're talking about the past here.
In my mindset of today I do my best to not carry a single regret. We make mistakes in life, as we should. But lessons in life wouldn't occur without these said mistakes. I feel that we grow with the lessons we learn from the mistakes we make. It's the ultimate goal, as such, considering that without these lessons, we carry mindsets from when we were younger. You gain knowledge as you grow, knowledge that should carry over to help you become the person that you aspire to be.
In most cases though, people harbor the past. They don't let it go. One thing I've learned is that it's definitely alright to just let go of the past and move on, especially if holding on to that past is doing nothing but holding you back from pressing forward in your life.
I personally think of an instance where a "best friend" of mine blamed me for all his life problems, said I took advantage of our friendship, did nothing for our friendship, and even for kicks threw in situations that amounted to nothing, to stomp all over me, show me he was better than me and didn't need me, that I needed him, and that I was nothing without him. And do you know what happened?
I moved on. Without him. VERY quickly.
My sadness towards him turned quickly to anger at myself for letting myself get to that point where something like this could hurt me. And once that anger passed I picked up my backpack and walked further and further away until he became nothing but a mental image..... a reminder of the mistake to never make again.
A month after that incident he e-mailed me asking if we could talk. He was "deeply remorseful" for the words and actions he had done in the month prior. He wanted another chance to show me that we were "best buds" and that "nothing could stand in the way of that." It was at that point I told him that as far as I was concerned he was nothing but an acquaintance to me. Sure we talked and laughed after that, but there was no friendship in my eyes. And there never was, and never would be again. Because it was then that I realized that the people I called friends would be my friends through it all. They wouldn't blame me for their life issues, but instead would seek support and help to get through it. As friends, we're like family.
I made it without that person. And I still do. The thoughts of it linger in my mind only to set as a reminder to myself that no matter what your true friends will always shine through the life and rough times.
The people who live in the past to prevent themselves from engaging in the life in front of them are the people, in my mind, who are holding on to something that will never exist again. When it goes, it truly is gone. A blatant refusal to enact yourself in the present can make you miss out on what's in front of you. This isn't about those who have memories, I mean people who don't engage in the present.
The past is the past. Let the vice-grip go and pick up to the present. Focus on the things you have now, the positives in front of you. Because even though it may be there right now, there is the chance that it could all be taken away from you in an instant, and it too will become another memory of the future you could have.
The past is just that, the past. Let it go. And let it be.
Live your life for the moments you have in it.
Because it could all be gone in an instant and you'll have nothing to live for.
I decided to change the look of my blog. Felt an update was in order.
Also, I hope to get onto a more consistent post schedule.
Sorry I took almost 10 days off. Just needed some time to focus on some things.
I do have one more blog in mind that I want to rattle off as well.
On to a personal note.....
I may be back later on. I would say tomorrow, but it's already Monday on the East Coast.
I'm getting glasses tomorrow as well. I'm rather excited. The Countdown will be at 8 days even as of 6am Pacific Standard Time on Monday / Today. I'm greatly looking forward to being back on the East Coast with all my friends in the few days that I'll have before Band Camp starts August 6th.
I'm excited to get back for other reasons as well, but we'll let those remain secretive for now. [smile]
Until Next Time.....
[Lanier3000]
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