We're All Different.
I got the motivation to write this based on an influence I got.
I'm a 21-year old kid who's struggled with his weight since entering college almost 4 years ago. It's not MADLY out of control, as I'm still healthy, but I have packed on the pounds, both in weight and in other ways, since then. It's not something I'm PROUD of per se, but I've dealt with accordingly. And now, for the first time, I feel as though I have a fantastic grip on this, and am doing what I need to do to make sure that I'm as healthy as I physically can be. If there's weight loss, well certainly that's a plus. But society does not control me, I DO.
Now, I've got height and weight on BOTH sides of my family, so it's not too much of a surprise to me. But when you look at me, I do not look like a fat person, yet when you hear my weight, I'd fall into a category where I'd be classified as obese. I CLEARLY do not look like an obese person, I promise you this. Even my doctor struggles with this, as my being falls into an average person's look and build, but the weight says otherwise. I am at, or above, 6 feet tall, so surprise? Not. It's just how I am, how I've always been. Never really have given much thought into it, until recently.
When I go shopping for clothes, it's a bit harder now-days. No longer do I find jeans that fit me comfortably everywhere that I want them to. I hate shopping for jeans or any kind of pants for that purpose, because all the things I want to wear I can't.... because there's nothing in my size there for me. Everything is so much smaller than I can wear, and it makes me sad almost, to the point where I'd just rather wear basketball shorts than attempt to buy what I want. Every time I look at them, it's like society's slapping me in the face telling me "You're too big to wear this. You'll never be able to fit into me." Not my best moments, but I resolve that, well, I look really good in certain color shirts and jeans fit my ass rather well. : )
It's not that I have horrible eating habits. I have friends who can eat me under the table sometimes. Everyone has their guilty pleasures, me included. But I don't eat to excess. I don't sit down and shovel food in my mouth. Recently, if you ask my friends, I wouldn't FINISH all my food, maybe not even half of it. I can't tell you how or why, but it just happens. I think that people associate fat with food, and it's not always the case.
Yet, when I go to the store, and I'm looking for clothes that I want, I can't buy what I like, because it's not in my size. I don't have a 30-inch waist, and I shouldn't feel like I should. But sometimes, I just wonder about it. It's not enough to make me do anything drastic to drop off weight, but the thought pings in my head sometimes, wondering what it truly would be like to actually be smaller, and not have to worry about particular things. It can be depressing to see your friends be able to wear cooler clothes and you kinda don't get that opportunity. Or, at least, that's how I felt.
As I've gone through life, I've realized that as humans, we're all meant to be different. Big or small, we're not suppose to be the same, that we're all unique in every way. And until you can accept that as fact and be able to do what you want to do with that, you'll forever struggle with the image that you're not what society calls normal.
I'll be at a 38-inch waist until I lose weight, which is slowly taking place. I have an entire closet of pants at a size 34, and my goal is that I'll be able to wear all that stuff, maybe even by Christmas if I'm lucky. Mostly because they're there and I wanna wear them, but not because I feel as though I have to. I just wanna wear them, to be honest. Plus, I like working out, and well, that's kinda a product of that. [lol]
In life, you'll always come across different kinds of people, whether skinny, slim, average, above average, overweight, or even muscular and bodybuilders. What I know is that we're not all suppose to be the same. I can't tell every human on the plant to gain weight so that I feel alright about how much I apparently weigh. What I can do is be accepting of my own body, what God's given me. And if, like me, you wanna do something about it, that should be alright, without being judged.
In all my life, I've never ranted about people being skinnier than me, or made fun of people that were fat, or bigger than me. Why? Because we're all meant to be different people. Yeah, it's frustrating to walk into Kohl's and have a problem finding a pair of jeans that fit right. But that's alright, because there's a pair of jeans for me out there to wear and look good in. They may already be in my closet for all I know, but they're out there.
Even as I continue my journey to being a much healthier Alfred, even if I never lost another pound from here on, it would have to be alright. Because we're all different. No one is suppose to be the same, and no one should feel like they have to be a certain way, or in this case, size, to fit into a particular mold in society. If I had to please everyone else by being a size 30 or 32, forget it. I like much better being the way that I am.
We're all different. DEAL with it accordingly.
That's all for now.
Peace easy, friends. : )
I'm a 21-year old kid who's struggled with his weight since entering college almost 4 years ago. It's not MADLY out of control, as I'm still healthy, but I have packed on the pounds, both in weight and in other ways, since then. It's not something I'm PROUD of per se, but I've dealt with accordingly. And now, for the first time, I feel as though I have a fantastic grip on this, and am doing what I need to do to make sure that I'm as healthy as I physically can be. If there's weight loss, well certainly that's a plus. But society does not control me, I DO.
Now, I've got height and weight on BOTH sides of my family, so it's not too much of a surprise to me. But when you look at me, I do not look like a fat person, yet when you hear my weight, I'd fall into a category where I'd be classified as obese. I CLEARLY do not look like an obese person, I promise you this. Even my doctor struggles with this, as my being falls into an average person's look and build, but the weight says otherwise. I am at, or above, 6 feet tall, so surprise? Not. It's just how I am, how I've always been. Never really have given much thought into it, until recently.
When I go shopping for clothes, it's a bit harder now-days. No longer do I find jeans that fit me comfortably everywhere that I want them to. I hate shopping for jeans or any kind of pants for that purpose, because all the things I want to wear I can't.... because there's nothing in my size there for me. Everything is so much smaller than I can wear, and it makes me sad almost, to the point where I'd just rather wear basketball shorts than attempt to buy what I want. Every time I look at them, it's like society's slapping me in the face telling me "You're too big to wear this. You'll never be able to fit into me." Not my best moments, but I resolve that, well, I look really good in certain color shirts and jeans fit my ass rather well. : )
It's not that I have horrible eating habits. I have friends who can eat me under the table sometimes. Everyone has their guilty pleasures, me included. But I don't eat to excess. I don't sit down and shovel food in my mouth. Recently, if you ask my friends, I wouldn't FINISH all my food, maybe not even half of it. I can't tell you how or why, but it just happens. I think that people associate fat with food, and it's not always the case.
Yet, when I go to the store, and I'm looking for clothes that I want, I can't buy what I like, because it's not in my size. I don't have a 30-inch waist, and I shouldn't feel like I should. But sometimes, I just wonder about it. It's not enough to make me do anything drastic to drop off weight, but the thought pings in my head sometimes, wondering what it truly would be like to actually be smaller, and not have to worry about particular things. It can be depressing to see your friends be able to wear cooler clothes and you kinda don't get that opportunity. Or, at least, that's how I felt.
As I've gone through life, I've realized that as humans, we're all meant to be different. Big or small, we're not suppose to be the same, that we're all unique in every way. And until you can accept that as fact and be able to do what you want to do with that, you'll forever struggle with the image that you're not what society calls normal.
I'll be at a 38-inch waist until I lose weight, which is slowly taking place. I have an entire closet of pants at a size 34, and my goal is that I'll be able to wear all that stuff, maybe even by Christmas if I'm lucky. Mostly because they're there and I wanna wear them, but not because I feel as though I have to. I just wanna wear them, to be honest. Plus, I like working out, and well, that's kinda a product of that. [lol]
In life, you'll always come across different kinds of people, whether skinny, slim, average, above average, overweight, or even muscular and bodybuilders. What I know is that we're not all suppose to be the same. I can't tell every human on the plant to gain weight so that I feel alright about how much I apparently weigh. What I can do is be accepting of my own body, what God's given me. And if, like me, you wanna do something about it, that should be alright, without being judged.
In all my life, I've never ranted about people being skinnier than me, or made fun of people that were fat, or bigger than me. Why? Because we're all meant to be different people. Yeah, it's frustrating to walk into Kohl's and have a problem finding a pair of jeans that fit right. But that's alright, because there's a pair of jeans for me out there to wear and look good in. They may already be in my closet for all I know, but they're out there.
Even as I continue my journey to being a much healthier Alfred, even if I never lost another pound from here on, it would have to be alright. Because we're all different. No one is suppose to be the same, and no one should feel like they have to be a certain way, or in this case, size, to fit into a particular mold in society. If I had to please everyone else by being a size 30 or 32, forget it. I like much better being the way that I am.
We're all different. DEAL with it accordingly.
That's all for now.
Peace easy, friends. : )
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